Wednesday, October 26, 2011

Elvis's Birthday Party

So, our downstairs neighbor Diana (the only other American in our building) came to my door the other day asking for translation help. Her daughter, Natalie, got an invite to the birthday party of one of the kids in her class. His name is Elvis. Yes, you read that correctly, some French moron named their kid Elvis. But wait, it gets better. The kid’s last name is: Polanski. As in, he is the son of that famous director who fled the US in 1977 after pleading guilty to sodomizing a 13 year old girl. From the get go, Diana had no intention of allowing her daughter to attend the party (which was being held at the Polanski residence). She doesn’t even want her daughter in the same class as Elvis (lest the apple not fall far from the tree) and pleaded with the director of the school to move Natalie to another class the day she found out Elvis was in there. But the director of the school refused and thus, Natalie was now the recipient of a birthday invite to the child molester’s house. “Read what it says here,” Diana instructed me pointing to the very bottom of the invite. “Guests will enjoy a screening of Elvis’s father’s latest film in the private screening room. This is a children only party.” I could scarcely believe my eyes! Not only is this convicted sexual predator holding a kiddie birthday party at his home, he is strictly forbidding adults from attending! And the kicker? All the other snotty Parisian Mamans are sending their sons (and daughters!) to the party and cannot understand why Diana won't let Natalie attend.